Life in the Slow Lane

I know I'm not the only one here that is heard some of the terrible stories that come along with the demons of Facebook. Friendships are questioned, friendships end. Boys and girls fight, both young and old. People break up, people get divorced, and so on. I've heard Facebook is nothing but trouble, Facebook is the devil, I would never join Facebook. But how about the other side of Facebook? The amazing side of Facebook? Sure there's other social media, but nothing quite as far-reaching as Facebook. The friend you haven't seen in 20 years since high school or childhood. The long-lost family that hasn't heard from you in ages. The family that you miss far away, but you feel like you're always there celebrating with them for the special occasions because you get to hear about all of the different steps along the way, and see all the amazing photos. Sure I have to had my share of problems on Facebook, but have also had the privilege of mending relationships through...

Last week we went to the boys' annual checkup at the pediatrician. You know the appointment, you wait for what feels like an eternity, just to get into the tiny room, be poked at for a minute, then released to pay? Ya. But when I checked out I was given a new kind of 'receipt'. On each was the child's stats from the current visit, along with any other pertinent health happenings from birth to now. And I was faced with this on the top of Alex's paper: PROBLEM LIST. That was the first thing I noticed. Those ding dongs that just want money, see my son as having problems. Nice. But after I got past that title, the list below it hit me. Hard.  Our Autism journey has been nothing short of a miracle as most of you know. I wish I had documented more of our last 7 years. But now is so different than then. Alex is mainstreamed. He doesn't shut up. He's funny as hell. Yes, he struggles with his words sometimes, his anger sometimes, definitely with schoolwo...

Why am I being handed Christmas lists already? It's way. Too. Early. I have way bigger things to think about(um wedding in 13 days!), and spending an obscene amount of money on items that wind up sitting in a closet until at least July is not a priority. I can remember asking for things when I was younger, and getting maybe 1 of the items on my list. My dad would give my mom a very tight budget for Christmas shopping, and she stuck to it. I got some nice items that I still have, but the list was usually out the window. So why is it so different these days? I find myself making sure I got everything on the lists, and then some. I save up for half a year to top the previous Christmas, and I'm pretty sure the kids now expect it. Which is why this year I'm all about operation 'scale back.' Sure, I was ticked when that Strawberry Shortcake doll wasn't under the tree, but I was grateful for what was. We were taught that you don't get everything you want, and there...

I noticed the weirdest thing this morning. When I went onto Google to find some information, I found myself automatically typing in "Should I.....". I stopped after the results came up and though ' wth, when did I trust Google so much to ask it's OPINION on matters of life? ' Sure, I love Google... we get along well. I am a pretty rad searcher gal, and always find what I need. But this is a way deeper relationship with Google than I planned on having. Do I not value people's opinions enough so I ask a search engine? Do I just need some affirmation of my own decisions? Am I just that naive? Not really sure. She(yes, my Google is a she) did give me the results I was hoping looking for, but I'm not sure if I trust her. I'm sure she could have given me lots of results on both sides of the fence, but she went with all the positive ones as her top choices. Is Google now in the business of just pleasing me and telling me what I want to hear? I don'...

My days are different lately. I will spare you all the drab details, but what I will say is how life can change in the blink of an eye(yes, literally). I'm not a good decision maker, and have been known to make my fair share of lousy ones. But what I can say on the flip side, is that even if I make a crap decision, I somehow, always dig myself out of the hole I got into, and come out clawing and stronger. That's how I feel today. That's how I've felt for a few weeks now. Shit, I'm in a hole. A big hole. A hole that I didn't fall into, I actually jumped in. My best move? Some would say absolutely, positively not. I (not today but at times) say hell yes. If you don't change and take a leap sometimes, how does life move forward? Isn't that why they call it a ' leap of faith '? You might not have my back this time, or during some of my previous decisions, and that's ok. There have been times I was on the outside looking in on someone, just...

**DISCLAIMER!** Sometimes I use the blogging app, and apparently this never posted:( Enjoy anyway, even though it mentions summer, it's still a great thought for every day with our children! I've been busy really enjoying my summer with the boys home. And I just finished reading my blog book! I've been trying to read a few books a week, but so far have been disappointed with every one I've gotten through. What are you reading right now? Back to our summer. When the boys were smaller, I have to admit, I was not a hands-on summer mom. I would do the daily routine and duties that were associated with having small people(fed them, took them to the park, play dates), but I never really jumped into the summer with them. A few years ago I learned the importance of being really present with them. Not on the phone, not texting or watching tv, just with them. I've learned to take them fishing, to the beach for the day, hiking, or just play board games with them. I kn...